Thursday, January 25, 2007

Is Martha Starting Rumors?

I heard about this on the radio on the way home from work and I don't believe it. The timing is off and it's way too late to bring it up, even if the rumor was remotely credible. I guess this means that "Miss E-V-Oh-Oh" has finally made the big time when the rumors are coming out of left field, like a giant space steer was slinging them.

I will tell you what was funny though, someone texted into the radio station and said, "Rachael Ray looks like a garden gnome."

Ponder that for a minute...
















is her favorite movie "Amelie?" Will she send a certain statue and the person who does his voiceover to the unemployment line, when she becomes the new spokesgnome for Travelocity? How's about her calling up the house of Vuitton and having them design for her, a line of red conical hats and boots to match? Or a whole show devoted to standing in the garden and trying to keep that same grin, while dogs use you as a urinal. The life of a garden gnome, is intense, Emilio.

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12 Comments:

Blogger Beth said...

Amelie is one of my favorite films. Am I a garden gnome and don't even realize it? Should I go shopping for a pointy hat?

Thu Jan 25, 07:39:00 AM PST  
Blogger chelene said...

If that photo is truly in the lobby of Harpo Studios...forget it, I'm just going to pretend I never read this.

Thu Jan 25, 09:02:00 AM PST  
Blogger Dale said...

I loved Amelie as well and have banished any thoughts of Rachel being connected with it. I'm okay with the spokesgnome though, that's funny.

Thu Jan 25, 04:10:00 PM PST  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Beth,

No, clearly from your pics on your blog, you're anything but gnomish. "Amelie" is in my all time top five.

Chelene,

I wonder if that this is the only true aspect to it and if it is, I'm aghast.

Dale,

Rachael was penciled in for the sequel, Le Fabuleux destin d'Rachael Ray, but after filming two scenes, it occurred to Jean-Pierre Jeunet that perky wouldn't go over to well in France.

Yeah, she'd make a great spokesgnome though.

Thu Jan 25, 07:58:00 PM PST  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Beth,

"No, clearly from your pics on your blog, you're anything but gnomish."

And by that, I mean you're not short, squat, or beardly.

Thu Jan 25, 08:01:00 PM PST  
Blogger "jew" "girl" said...

the oprah comments make no sense. can't imagine she'd say that. but the other comments are hilar squared.

Fri Jan 26, 11:47:00 AM PST  
Blogger "jew" "girl" said...

ps: the word verification on my former comment was vaaj. funny, wp, no?

Fri Jan 26, 11:47:00 AM PST  
Blogger is that so wrong? said...

I can't lie that the idea of Rachael Ray getting drunk on very large glasses of wine in restaurants is both hilarious and probably a very real weekly occurrence. It's not too far a stretch to instantly picture her a surly drunk, cursing you out before she vomits a little bit onto her dinner plate.

Sat Jan 27, 10:21:00 AM PST  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Katie,

I can't imagine her biting the hand that feeds her. It's...so..."sugar tits." Some of those word verifcations have little jokes in them, though that one conjures odd thoughts from a certain Palmolive commercial with a mad manicurist.

ITSW,

I always wonder if the Internet rumors that she does the show with a buzz on, are true. Certainly she seems to joke about enough whenever her desert course has alcohol. Yet, she was on the verge of something big financially, so I can't imagine her taking shots at her Oprahness.

Jesus forgives, God sometimes, but Oprah?

Sat Jan 27, 03:26:00 PM PST  
Blogger angel said...

i have no idea who rachel ray is... but what they wrote just sounded bitchy, not necessarily racist.

Sun Jan 28, 02:52:00 AM PST  
Blogger "jew" "girl" said...

agreed, wp. it's just not smart to bite the hand that feeds you. not that we don't know a gazillion people who have. though I can't imagine she would.

Sun Jan 28, 08:48:00 AM PST  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Angel,

Rachael Ray is...

http://www.foodnetwork.com/food/
rachael_ray/0,1974,FOOD_9928,00.html

And she's also...

http://www.rachaelrayshow.com/

But if you were to ask me, she's the "Queen of Perky" who sometimes gets dishes right, but most of the time, she gets them wrong. We watch her 30 Minute Meals Show because it comes on right around dinner time.

Sun Jan 28, 04:28:00 PM PST  

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