Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Sweet Sixteenth Anniversary Part II

"Duck!"

Ah yes, the joyous occasion that is a wedding anniversary! First, there is the exchanging of the gifts and every year is pretty much the same. Upon receiving the gift that I bestow upon The Missus, she flees for the bedroom, where she locks herself in there, cries for half an hour. Then? She comes out throwing.


This year? I got her something more practical, so she only cried for fifteen minutes and as she exhausted her vase ammunition on her birthday, she only threw things at me for a couple of minutes. Oh, joy!


We had dinner at Mel's on Geary, actually I had breakfast. It doesn't wear you down as much when you have a long drive ahead. As to where we were going, I had little idea other than the fact that we would be traveling north on the 101.


"I Can Drive, 55, Sammy Hagar"


The Missus gave me directions, but I didn't know what our ultimate destination would be. Barring whatever route that an airplane has taken on our return flights from New York, I haven't been this far north in California, since the summer of 1982. If I had only known we were going this route, I would've bought Journey's "Escape" and Queen's "The Game" to relive the experience.


As we got north of the (San Francisco) Bay Area, we finally got to see all those Native American casinos that they advertise on TV. Then the roads got difficult. Dark, uneven, unfamiliar, and this reminds me of an ex, but I digress. At any rate, I had to keep around 55 mph or under on some of the curves. Which was not fun when the lanes narrowed down to one because of "construction" and some of these gamblers were in real hurry to lose their money.


This was to be a recurring theme that weekend, phantom road construction and people charging around in a hurry, though people up there were insanely polite when it came to four-way stops. Procrastinator Junior became confused, because the terrain resembles that of the area just east of Fresno, on the way to Yosemite. Once you go inland in California, the rolling hills look pretty much the same, with the only difference being the trees, and how dry the grass gets.


Because I let him watch most of Wild Police Videos (excluding the shootings and crowd control melees) Junior brought up some of the accidents that he has seen. With semis and would-be gamblers all over the road and driving stupid, I asked him to change the subject.


"Me, Tarzan...Ukiah"


We were on our way to Ukiah, which I haven't been through since 1976 and I'm not sure if I swung through there in '82. It is a one and a half horse town and while our local TV stations mention it during the weather, I don't consider anything north of Santa Rosa to be part of the Bay Area.


Not only that, there is no graffiti in Ukiah, thus, it really isn't in the Bay Area. I mean, even in the most placcid of suburbs, there are tags here. Honestly, in the last two years, the only two places where I haven't seen tags or etched glass, are east of Queens and Ukiah and the towns north of it.

What I missed on the way up because of the darkness, was all the vineyards. From Calistoga until Willits, every other lot seemed to be a vineyard. I have been writing for the better part of the last thirty-six hours, so I'll leave it off here and resume this on Thursday.

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11 Comments:

Blogger Beth said...

I envy you two. In a good way, of course.

Tue Oct 02, 07:04:00 PM PDT  
Blogger BeckEye said...

Dark, windy roads...are you sure she wasn't trying to ditch you somewhere? I mean, 16 years is a long time.

Wed Oct 03, 01:56:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Beth,

I envy me, too...what?

Becky,

Damn! I joked about the same thing with her! Only I suggested that we were to go hiking on near a cliff and I'd get the accidental shove.

She didn't exactly deny it.

Wed Oct 03, 04:25:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Coaster Punchman said...

I like this. Looking forward to finding out what transpired. Did you take a page from my book by leaving us with these cliffhangers?

Also, I find it hard to believe Ms. Procrastinator would be unhappy with your gifts. When you said at first she locked herself in the bedroom I figured you were talking about sexy lingerie or something. Which would really be a gift to yourself so it wouldn't count, right?

What, did you give her a blender? A vacuum? Inquiring minds want to know.

Oh, and I adore road-tripping through California. I love taking the small local roads between the major metro areas. Poor George and I will be out there soon enough, don't worry.

Wed Oct 03, 05:14:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Coaster,

This is no cliffhanger, it's burnout. I am trying to get three stories done simultaneously and nothing good has come of this.

"What, did you give her a blender? A vacuum? Inquiring minds want to know."

That can wait for tomorrow's post, though lingerie does virtually nothing for me. I prefer la mode au naturale.

Road-tripping through California is nice, but I prefer the coast over the interior. I know George's ears are on fire as Junior brags about him at least three times a week.

Wed Oct 03, 06:35:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Bubs said...

I'm intrigued.

As for anniversary gifts, I hear chicks dig gift certificates to Home Depot.

Thu Oct 04, 04:49:00 AM PDT  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Bubs,

Now I know where Missus Bubs got the Lizzy Borden idea.

Thu Oct 04, 07:49:00 AM PDT  
Anonymous gifted typist said...

If the person I were married to for sixteen year called me anything preceded the a definite article, I'd cry too.

Thu Oct 04, 05:24:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Gifted Typist,

Welcome to this dusty corner of the Internet and that's right, I'm Mister Romantic ; )

Thu Oct 04, 08:28:00 PM PDT  
Blogger jewgirl said...

you two are so damn cute, I can't stand it. I'm just relieved that part three is already posted so I can read it.

I know ukiah. I have been! omgeers.

Sun Oct 07, 10:31:00 PM PDT  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Part III is the letdown and Part IV is gonna be a little better.

"I know ukiah. I have been! omgeers."

Let's cold flip them out and start a temple up there. Then they can run the town slogan, "Ukiah, the "k" is for kosher."

Mon Oct 08, 06:56:00 AM PDT  

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