Have a Happy Turkey Day
It's the day to be thankful for and I'm thankful for the wife and kid. Thankful for still being gainfully employed though some days are more like boxing with Gerry Cooney than others and even a cup made of titanium just ain't gonna cut it.
Thankful for the blog because I've actually come close to finishing two short stories and have found out that short stories in other magazines are actually just excerpts. Thankful that no one has answered my emails because it's helped me discover that...
(cue Denis Leary)
...he's the world's biggest a**h***!
Thank you Denis, your royalty check is in the mail as soon as I actually sell a t-shirt.
Bitter? No. I've confronted the problem, diagnosed the problem, called in the Hoover Think Tank and Ralph Nader at the taxpayer's expense, brought in the neighbor's bloodhound. Brought in "Condi" and the "Big Cheney" because they know what they're doing and the mission is accomplished so let's move on to the next front. Brought in Dickie York because the franchise is running in the right direction because Coach Nolan told me so, brought in Dan Rather because he ain't got s*** else to do and the man knows his ducks, Kenneth.
So I brought together all these great minds ladies and gentlemen, and found out the problem is...
me.
Got it, okay. Filed it. Wait, wait, , no. Let me go get an NFL Referee...
NFL Referee: Upon further review...the play stands!
Damn, I hate instant replay. Oh well, I'm usually less of an a**h*** the day after Christmas anyway and this year I will take that advice clad in all the silky refinement of silence to heart. Happy Thanksgiving everybody!
Thankful for the blog because I've actually come close to finishing two short stories and have found out that short stories in other magazines are actually just excerpts. Thankful that no one has answered my emails because it's helped me discover that...
(cue Denis Leary)
...he's the world's biggest a**h***!
Thank you Denis, your royalty check is in the mail as soon as I actually sell a t-shirt.
Bitter? No. I've confronted the problem, diagnosed the problem, called in the Hoover Think Tank and Ralph Nader at the taxpayer's expense, brought in the neighbor's bloodhound. Brought in "Condi" and the "Big Cheney" because they know what they're doing and the mission is accomplished so let's move on to the next front. Brought in Dickie York because the franchise is running in the right direction because Coach Nolan told me so, brought in Dan Rather because he ain't got s*** else to do and the man knows his ducks, Kenneth.
So I brought together all these great minds ladies and gentlemen, and found out the problem is...
me.
Got it, okay. Filed it. Wait, wait, , no. Let me go get an NFL Referee...
NFL Referee: Upon further review...the play stands!
Damn, I hate instant replay. Oh well, I'm usually less of an a**h*** the day after Christmas anyway and this year I will take that advice clad in all the silky refinement of silence to heart. Happy Thanksgiving everybody!
posted by Writeprocrastinator at 8:04 AM
4 Comments:
Now I will have that asshole song stuck in my head for the rest of the day. It will soon be a holiday classic. :)
Infectious, ain't it? : )
I'm gonna make my theme song <: o
Oops. I think I'm one of the people who hasn't answered your email-- I kinda sorta have an excuse-- aside from going through the hell of moving into a new place-- AOL-Hell put your last email to me in my Spam Folder-- it didn't recognize your address. I just saw it the other day for the first time. I'll follow the links and see what's up!
Yep, you do have a lot to be thankful for-- you've got a terrific family there! Enjoy the weekend, hope you have some time off for good behavior. --Grove (Albert!)
Albert,
Thanks very much for stopping by and I'm sorry that you have to learn a little HTML but hey, no banner ads! Most importantly like I said, you won't lose posts to the Internet ether like other blog engines.
How come youse guys can throw up better gang signs den me? Dhat ain't right! Most be a New Yawk-thing.
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