Post #100 Or Breathe, Stupid...
Technically this is the 101st Post because I posted one and then deleted it after an hour, because it was more inappropriate than usual. So, as long as I am on a roll...at the most inconvient times that insipid Anna Nayick song comes on while I'm driving. You know it, the one that starts out...
Two AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake, "Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?"
You call me up at my equivalent of two AM and you better be:
A) Stranded.
B) In jail and need bail.
C) Something major better have had happened to somebody that we mutally know.
D) Any combination thereof.
I'd add something to "C," but I'll let you know on Saturday or next week. But you better believe that you cannot call me up because you made the same relationship mistake, especially after I told you not to date the bastard. That sh*t can wait for when I wake up or you can cry on someone's shoulder who doesn't work the graveyard shift.
So the friend of the song's narrator prattles on and on, to which the song's narrator replies...
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,Oh breathe, just breathe
Or so I think, because my brain typicall shuts off at this point and I can't change the station because of traffic or a similar nusiance. I cannot even read the lyrics right now without flinching. I usually respond in my head or outloud to the chorus with my imitaton of Louie the Parrot of the Looney Tune's cartoon "Dough Ray Me-ow" http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0040299/
Louie is the guardian so to speak, of Heathcliff the cat, who is no relation to the comic strip precursor of Garfield. In the cartoon, Heathcliff is a large cat who is literally dumb as a post and he runs up to Louie, gasping as his face turns different colors. Louie slaps him and says, "breathe, stupid, breathe! You forgot to breathe!"
So Anna Nayick goes Oh breathe, just breathe
And I go, "just breath, stupid, breathe!"
Endless auto-fun in more ways than one, don't you know?
Two AM and she calls me 'cause I'm still awake, "Can you help me unravel my latest mistake?"
You call me up at my equivalent of two AM and you better be:
A) Stranded.
B) In jail and need bail.
C) Something major better have had happened to somebody that we mutally know.
D) Any combination thereof.
I'd add something to "C," but I'll let you know on Saturday or next week. But you better believe that you cannot call me up because you made the same relationship mistake, especially after I told you not to date the bastard. That sh*t can wait for when I wake up or you can cry on someone's shoulder who doesn't work the graveyard shift.
So the friend of the song's narrator prattles on and on, to which the song's narrator replies...
So cradle your head in your hands
And breathe... just breathe,Oh breathe, just breathe
Or so I think, because my brain typicall shuts off at this point and I can't change the station because of traffic or a similar nusiance. I cannot even read the lyrics right now without flinching. I usually respond in my head or outloud to the chorus with my imitaton of Louie the Parrot of the Looney Tune's cartoon "Dough Ray Me-ow" http://us.imdb.com/title/tt0040299/
Louie is the guardian so to speak, of Heathcliff the cat, who is no relation to the comic strip precursor of Garfield. In the cartoon, Heathcliff is a large cat who is literally dumb as a post and he runs up to Louie, gasping as his face turns different colors. Louie slaps him and says, "breathe, stupid, breathe! You forgot to breathe!"
So Anna Nayick goes Oh breathe, just breathe
And I go, "just breath, stupid, breathe!"
Endless auto-fun in more ways than one, don't you know?
Labels: Writing
posted by Writeprocrastinator at 12:58 PM
6 Comments:
"So Anna Nayick goes Oh breathe, just breathe And I go, "just breath, stupid, breathe!"
fabulous, funny post as always, wp.
your blog brightens my day and makes me laugh, always!
Thanks Katie, you're the perfect antidote to the blog crickets ; )
I feel the same way about that stupid song. I think Anna and frickin' James Blunt should be stuck together on some deserted island where they can write breathy, whiny, idiotic songs all day long and none of us would ever have to hear them. :)
Gizmo,
Absolutely. Uh, who is James Blunt and which whiny song does he do?
Argh, I hate that song. It makes me think of really skinny girls with strategically tousled hair and super long-sleeved sweaters that hang over their hands that are clutching some gigantic Starbucks vanilla latte. In other words, annoying girls I see all the time walking around Manhattan.
"In other words, annoying girls I see all the time walking around Manhattan."
Becka,
Not just in Manhattan, they are ubiquitous, they are legion, they ARE Starbucks.
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