Monday, November 27, 2006

She Wore A Raspberry Tag-ret...

DDL always humors me when I tag her, so she left an open meme and here's my response...

DO YOU SNORE?

No, though I'm prone to heavy breathing. Stop laughing, I mean in my sleep.

ARE YOU A LOVER OR A FIGHTER?

I'm a lover that loves to fight, and I fight to love, and...


I'm all over the place. I am a lover, but when I get angry enough , I have no sense and will take on almost anybody.

WHAT’S YOUR WORST FEAR?

Only the Missus knows most of them and Procrastinator Jr. knows about a fifth of them. I'm not trying to be a bad sport, but I will not put them on the web for all to see.

AS A KID, WERE YOU A LEGO MANIAC?

I was more about Hot Wheels, Godzilla and Ultraman, but Legos were in there somewhere.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF “REALITY” TV?

In general, it's a waste of time, though it's not the decline of civilization as people make it out to be. Most who would act like idiots on reality TV, would do so in the absence of cameras as well. These shows just provide a platform for their egotism and idiocy.


I watched only a few episodes of "Blind Date" this season, so my fascination with dating shows in general, has faltered to an all-time low. I will watch pretty much anything on the TLC for five minutes, "Top Chef," and any show involving cars. "Project Greenlight; Season Three," was some of the best TV ever.

DO YOU CHEW ON YOUR STRAWS?

I stopped teething at two. Speaking of which...

WERE YOU A CUTE BABY?

Hell yeah, then I became an awkward looking child. I was all hair, teeth and lips...which I didn't grow into until I was fourteen.

IS THE SINGLE LIFE FOR YOU?

No and I've never really cottoned to it when I was a bachelor.

WHAT COLOR IS YOUR KEYBOARD?

Is this like that book from the 70's, "What Color Is Your Parachute?" The laptop is a light grey and I'll be editing this on a black keyboard at home.

DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER?

Not half as much as when I was a teenager. I just tried to sing along to Y & T's "Rescue Me" in the car and I didn't hit any of the notes properly.

HAVE YOU EVER BUNGEE JUMPED?

No "strange fruit" here. Anything that remotely looks like a rope and I'll be way the hell over there, thank you very much.

ANY SECRET TALENTS?

No one that knows me personally, knows that I'm a writer. Seriously. Outside of prodco, contest and studio readers, the Missus, Procrastinator Junior's Godmother, Mr. C, and Mr. C's friends are the only people who have read my scripts in their entirety. My brother-in-law has one of my short stories and that's about it.

WHAT’S YOUR IDEAL VACATION SPOT?

Italia, Italia, Italia.

CAN YOU SWIM?

I dog-paddle more now. I used to be able kick, Crispin Glover, but not anymore, and I was never good with my arms.

HAVE YOU SEEN THE MOVIE DONNIE DARKO?

No, dammit! I keep forgetting to rent it.

DO YOU GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE OZONE?

Absolutely, but not to the point that I'm gonna wait on Muni (the S.F. bus and streetcar system) for forty minutes for a trip that should take Muni only twenty.

HOW MANY LICKS DOES IT TAKE TO GET TO THE CENTER OF A TOOTSIE POP?

I don't know, this question gets me too worked up. So go ask Mr. Owl, Alice, Lil' Kim or Prince.

CAN YOU SING THE ALPHABET BACKWARDS?

I can't sing it or say it, but I can see some words backwards because of my dyslexia.

DO YOU PREFER ELECTRIC OR MANUAL PENCIL SHARPENER?

I don't use pencils, because I'm one of the those left-handers that smears everything. Procrastinator Jr. uses a manual one.

WHAT’S YOUR STAND ON HUNTING?

Personally? I'm not for it. But it doesn't mean that you can't.

IS MARRIAGE IN YOUR FUTURE?

Um, hello! It's in my past, in my present and sure as hell better be in my future!

DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?

No.

WHAT ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO?

Pollen, cats, dairy to a degree, dust, and most Republicans.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SAID, “I LOVE YOU”?

Every time I look in the mirror? Kidding. Every day to the Missus and Procrastinator Jr, especially before I leave for work.

DO YOU CRY AT WEDDINGS?

A tear wells up here and there. I'm not the crying type, even when I'm sad.

HOW DO YOU LIKE YOUR EGGS?

Every way except soft-boiled.

ARE BLONDES DUMB?

No dumber than anyone else that would rely on their looks or a particular feature to get by. Everyone that succumbs to a stereotype, deserves a small portion (emphasis, small) of the idiotic comments that ensue.

WHERE DOES THE OTHER SOCK END UP?

Sometimes under the bed, though mostly, the Missus hides everything. That's how she assesses dominance in this house.

WHAT TIME IS IT?

I don't know, who's asking? Morris Day or the Spin Doctors? Just go ahead now...

DO YOU HAVE A NICKNAME?

You all call me "WP" and you have no idea how I abhor that, but I don't say anything

>: P

IS MCDONALD’S DISGUSTING?

I don't eat at McDonald's or Taco Smell, ugh.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WERE IN A CAR?

Two hours ago.

DO YOU PREFER BATHS OR SHOWERS?

Showers. Baths are the luxury of those who have bathtubs instead of shower stalls and parents who have time.

IS SANTA CLAUS REAL?

In a way. The Missus saves Christmas every year.

DO YOU LIKE TO HAVE YOUR NECK KISSED?

Whoo, that used to be my everything!

ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK?

I work from 10 PM until 6 AM. Uh, no.

WHAT ARE YOU ADDICTED TO?

Caffeine and video games.

CRUNCHY OR CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER?

What, you like chewing on rocks?

CAN YOU CRACK YOUR NECK?

If I come home late by five minutes, I get it cracked for free!

HAVE YOU EVER RIDDEN IN AN AMBULANCE?

Not in this country.

IS DRUG FREE THE WAY TO BE?

As far as I'm concerned, yes.

ARE YOU A HEAVY SLEEPER?

If I get into a deep enough sleep, only the calling of my name, the alarm or the phone can wake me up.

WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR EYES?

Brown.

DO YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE?

Absolutely, but a little writing success wouldn't hurt.

ARE YOU PSYCHIC?

Hmm, I see a meme in your future.

HAVE YOU READ CATCHER IN THE RYE?

Yes. I found myself identifying with Holden just a little too much back then. Except I didn't go to a prep school and my acne wasn't as severe.

DO YOU PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS?

I used to play the guitar...poorly. I'll take it up again, soon.

HAVE YOU EVER STOLEN MONEY?

Money? No. I did the shop-lifting thing in junior high and I was an accomplice (only by the definition of the law) in a minor-league break-in.

CAN YOU SNOWBOARD?

Don't I wish! I took up skateboarding again back in '94, in an effort to transition into snowboarding.

DO YOU LIKE CAMPING?

I'm a city-boy all the way. I have to have a toilet and shower, plus that whole "Deliverance" -thing gets me down.

DO YOU SNORT WHEN YOU LAUGH?

If it's funny enough, spontaneous snorting has been known to happen.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC?

Not that crap that happens on a stage.

ARE DOGS A MAN’S BEST FRIEND?

The best things in the world, are dogs, for their unconditional love.

YOU BELIEVE IN DIVORCE?

Yes, but I wish people wouldn't use it as a "mulligan," or a "do-over," as much as they do.

CAN YOU DO THE MOONWALK?

I used to pop-n-lock back in the day, but I could never moonwalk properly.

DO YOU MAKE A LOT OF MISTAKES?

I'd be somebody else, if I had a perfect day.

IS IT COLD OUTSIDE TODAY?

A little.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?

Salad, jalepeno poppers, buffalo wings, and half a roast beef sandwich.

DO YOU WEAR NAIL POLISH?

No and I don't get drunk 'til the point that I pass out anymore, so nobody is going to put it on me.

HOW MANY PEOPLE DO YOU LIKE RIGHT NOW?

The immediate family, about a dozen people at work and you, who read this blog.

WHAT’S THE MOST ANNOYING TV COMMERCIAL?

How can I narrow that one down? "Head-on?" Any political ad? Any "career college?"

DO YOU SHOP AT AMERICAN EAGLE?

Never have, never been.

FAVORITE SONG AT THE MOMENT?

Today, Gizmo? "Low" by Cracker.

WHO ARE YOU TAGGING?

In alphabetical order...

Beck Eye (I told you that you're tagged for life)
Beth
Gian Don. If only because it gets you to blog ; )
James
Katie

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11 Comments:

Blogger DDL said...

LOL, love it. Yer like, sewwww awesome and stuff. I didn't expect anyone to do that meme.

I'll make you a deal...I'll stop calling you WP if you stop putting periods in my name. It's actually spelled and pronounced DDL and it drives me crazy when you type it that way. Deal? ;)

I'm thinking WritePro....you have a really long name ya know.

Tue Nov 28, 07:45:00 AM PST  
Blogger katie schwartz said...

morris day and the time and lock and pop. oh, wp, you are too much. that was the most hysterical meemish I've read in a ages. so damn funny.

hi. howling.

Tue Nov 28, 02:40:00 PM PST  
Blogger BeckEye said...

Gee, thanks for keeping it short and sweet. Oh, and thanks for tagging me and then stealing all the funny pop culture references like Li'l Kim and Morris Day. What does that leave me with? Yep, more K-Fed.

Tue Nov 28, 02:45:00 PM PST  
Blogger justacoolcat said...

You just don't see Y&T mentioned enough these days. I wonder how their hair is . . .

"though mostly, the Missus hides everything. That's how she assesses dominance in this house"

It's the same in my house.

Tue Nov 28, 02:58:00 PM PST  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

DDL,

"I'll make you a deal...I'll stop calling you WP if you stop putting periods in my name."

You've got it...Dani California. The post is rectified.

Katie,

That's what I love about blogdom, everybody is old enough or experienced enough to get older cultural references. Drop the same ones at my job and everybody wears huge question markes over their heads.

Tue Nov 28, 08:44:00 PM PST  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Becka,

Oh c'mon, you literally take up all the good pop cultural references and you scoop me every time. I haven't been over to your blog today, but I'll bet you've already skewered Pamela-titis C and Squid Cock, far better than any Midtown shish kebob cart.

JCC,

"You just don't see Y&T mentioned enough these days. I wonder how their hair is . . ."

I wonder that myself. I heard that David Menketti got rid of the rest of the band, but I'm not sure. I do know that he did a kick ass acoustical set on our local rock station...

http://www.1077thebone.com/

...and that he did better vocally than Don Dokken, who goofed up on "Breakin' The Chains" and couldn't finish, because he was cracking up too hard.

As far as the hair? Not everybody can do bald like Rob Halford, so I respect cats like Kevin DuBrow when they get plugs or hairpieces. It is "hair rock," after all.

"It's the same in my house."

Ahh, maybe this is a national-thing? The one that really gets me is where she hides the remote when she cleans the table before dinner.

Tue Nov 28, 08:57:00 PM PST  
Blogger John Donald Carlucci said...

I'm not blogging as much cuz I'm writing. Man. You know how hard it is to write embarrassingly personal blogs and still maintain my own personal demons to keep the level of insecurity and low confidence I've grown accustomed to?

I will be writing about my disgust that I haven't climbed Mount Everest by 40 and Bear Grylls did it at 23 with a broken back (in three places).
Bastard.

Oh yeah, I posted my meme.

JDC

Tue Nov 28, 09:16:00 PM PST  
Blogger DDL said...

LOL, you didn't have to change the post.

Maybe one of these days I'll reveal the incredibly boring story story behind the nickname.

Wed Nov 29, 12:39:00 AM PST  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

Gian Don,

"I'm not blogging as much cuz I'm writing."

*Ouch!*

Excuse me...that was my muse giving me a swift kick in the rear. I'll follow your fine example.

I think it was Creative Screenwriting that an article on a para (or was he a "quadri?")plegic that did his scripts via dictation and voice recognition software. Instead of being inspired, I fell into a two-week funk over my comparative laziness.

DDL,

"Maybe one of these days I'll reveal the incredibly boring story story behind the nickname."

Do tell, do tell.

Wed Nov 29, 07:07:00 AM PST  
Blogger John Donald Carlucci said...

I wasn't giving you a slap! I feel bad now, but not as bad as I feel about not climbing Everest.
Bastard.

JDC

Wed Nov 29, 02:32:00 PM PST  
Blogger Writeprocrastinator said...

"I wasn't giving you a slap! I feel bad now, but not as bad as I feel about not climbing Everest.
Bastard."

Heh-heh-heh, no Gian Don, that's my conscious laying the wood down.

Wed Nov 29, 07:40:00 PM PST  

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